Why are people so weird?

Why are people so weird? Why are dogs the only normal creatures on earth? Ok, so humans can be very nice. But I tell you, they. are. weird!

Like I'm still trying to figure this one out. Why do humans talk to each other in very normal voices about very common things? They're just like "oh, did you put the groceries away? Where's the dog?" and then the other person answers "yeah, most of them. She's right behind you."

And then the first person turns around and weirdness happens. All of a sudden they're like "oohhh such a silly doggie! You snuck up behind me! You're such a sneaky doggit! Where's your ball? Oh, you have your bone! No, Carly, no. This the refrigerator. It's for people, not doggies!"

Well, duh. Of course I know that's a refrigerator. Everyone knows that. And of course I know it's for people. Why on earth would I be interested in it if it were for dogs?! This entire paragraph is just very offensive. A lot of it's the stupid voice it's said in, you know, that really baby-talkish voice that people use on dogs. But probably the most offensive thing about it is that people automatically assume that dogs are dumb! I am smarter than most people, why do you think I'm so stupid?!

And I am not a doggit. That's too much like muppet.