WOOF WOOF WOOF

Oh deer me, have I really not written in a week? Well, I've been distracted. You see, there are rabbits! And other things! That move! All in the yard! And I'm so distracted!

But that's not really why I've been distracted. Crazy things happened this week! You know how I told you about the big dogs named Gemini and Judah? Well, I was at their house! But not just for a little bit. Mom and Dad and Brianna took me to their house and we went in and said hi and then they brought in my crate and blanket and food and even my tennis ball and treats and they put it all up and then they left. They LEFT! MY PEOPLE LEFT ME!!!

I have to admit, I wasn't terribly perturbed. I mean, I got to play with Judah for like, two days! He and I are best friends now!! (don't tell Sammy, he might be jealous.) But there was this awful wagging feeling inside me that my people had completely abandoned me. But all the people there were really nice (even though one of the boys about Brianna's age wouldn't give me the tennis ball and then he felt upset when I nearly took his hand off. Of course, that was accidental.)

Judah and I played. Nonstop. Gemini kind of tolerated us. She wasn't terribly friendly. But Judah and i are best friends!! and I was such a happy dog!! And the girls didn't want to give me back because they thought I was such a nice dog. Oh, but I love humanity.

And then my people came back! My people came back! They came back! And I still won't let them out of my sight!! I missed them!!! I'm just happy they came back to got me. AND YOU KNOW WHAT?!?! When I went home, they gave me a toy! It's blue and Judah and Gemini didn't like it much. AND IT SQUEAKS!!!! IT SQUEAKS!!!! IT'S MY NEW MOST FAVORITE THING!!!!! IT SSQQQEEEEEEEKKKSSSS!!!!!!

MY LIFE IS AMAZZZINNNNGGGGGG I've just been so happy lately!!!!

I am so confused?

So there's this puffball, right? Well, it's still here. And I'm still not sure why. I'm quite annoyed today. She won't play! And when I try to play with her, she gets fed up with me and hauls off and yaps! And I don't understand why. And I'm supposedly being really annoying, but I don't get that. I am just so confused. I'm also extremely jealous because Katie is allowed to sit on people's laps and I'm not allowed on the furniture!!! What is wrong with this?! I WANT EQUAL RIGHTS. Not only that, but then the puffball has the audacity to sleep on my pillow! What is wrong with humanity?! Society is falling to ruin!!

This is me and the puffball on Brianna's rug. I'm contemplating chewing on her guitar case and sleeping on her clean laundry, but I doubt she'd appreciate it, even though destruction is the sincerest form of flattery. She should clean her room, anyway.

See? Isn't it weird? It's little. And really fluffy. And I don't understand it. I wish she'd just tell me what she's thinking, but she won't. I think maybe she's sad that her people haven't come to get her. Maybe? I don't know.

In other news, all the snow was all melted and it was nice and muddy and springy, but today it snowed. TODAY IT SNOWED. Can you believe that?! I don't know if I should be really happy or really annoyed. I'm so confused.

Oh, oh, oh, and you'll never guess what happened this weekend!! Eeeeelaina came over and so did Emerleh and then Eeeeeelaina stayed over and it was amazing!!! I LOVE REDHEADS OH MY GOODNESS and they also drank coffee (I don't get the point of this coffee stuff, but all my people consume it like crazy, it's gotten really bad lately, they keep drinking more and more of it) and Emerleh put her empty mug on the floor and I started to lick it, and then Brianna yelled at me.... It tasted good, but kind of funny. I'm also a little paranoid, is my tongue too big?

Oh dear. Oh dear.

OH DEER!!!! CAN I CHASE ONE NOW?!?!?! No?! Then why did you bring it up?! Oh wait... I brought it up. DEER!!!!! I LOVE DEER!!!!!!

Getting back to the point... Did I have a point? I haven't posted in so long I've forgotten how! Well, it's been very busy around here with these "holiday" things. I guess the most important thing to tell you is that I GOT A TON OF TREATS AND THERE HAVE BEEN KAYLEES AND REDHEADS AND EMERLEHS AND LEAHS RUNNING RAMPANT AND THE HOUSE GOT CLEANED AND THERE WAS A TREE (a tree??) SET UP IN THE LIVING ROOOM (we went out and tromped through mud and chopped it down and then they stuck it in the living room?) AND THERE WAS LOTS OF FOOD AND THAT FURRY JINGLY THING MOM GOT ME?! WELL IT WAS STUFFED WITH TREATS AND SQUEAKY THINGS!!!!!! I guess... Hmm. Well, I guess I'll just post some pictures! I love pictures!

Yes. She seriously put a bow on me. Thank goodness she forgot about the reindeer costume!!!

Nobody will admit to doing this.

So here's a rather late Merry Christmas to you! Oh, and a Happy New Year, too, whatever that means. All I know about the New Year is that that's when Emerleh and Eeeeelaina showed up and we went down to the dog park but it was really dark and there were no other dogs there and they started whooping and hollering "happy New Year". It really made no sense, even after thinking about for a couple days? Can anybody enlighten me?

MERREH CHRISTMAS!!! HAPPEH NEW YEAARR!!!!!

Ahh yes, my rabbit.

It met a sad and tragic end -- my people say by me, but I say by them! It was in perfectly good shape (abet the head, which was nowhere to be found). And so my people had the cruelty to throw it out! This was all that remained.

A tragic picture, isn't it? The lack of wholeness in this picture echos the lack of wholeness in my heart.

WHEEEEEEEE THURSDAY!!!!!!!!!

TODAY WAS THUUUUUURSDAY!!!!!!!!!! AND BESIDES GOING AND PLAYING ALL DAY LONG, I GOT A NEW THINGUM!!!!!!!!!

You see, after I got home, Dad opened up this big box that smelled like Grandma and pulled out a bed! A doggie bed!! It's fuzzy and kind of small and I LOOOOVE IT!!!! (Dad says she got it for fifty cents at something called a "yard sale". I don't know what that is, or how much fifty cents is exactly, either, but I think it must be a lot of money and a very wonderful place.) And it sort of vaguely smells like another dog!!!! I reeeally reallly love it!!!!

That's me. On my dog bed. With my smashingly gorgeous collar. And the towel that they wipe my paws with. Isn't this just the most beautiful picture you've ever seen of the most adorable creature in the universe? Of course!

DAD IS BAAAAAACK!!!!!!!!!

HE'S BACK HE'S BACK HE'S BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tonight I KNEW what was going to happen, I swear I did! So when Brianna took me out to "find a spot" I didn't want to! She finally just put me in the back of the car. And then when we drove a little ways and Brianna got me out I also didn't want to go! I snurfed and snurfed and snurfed and the place smelled like... IDK. A lot of people. It was the same place, I think, that Mom took me the second week I came home. We found Brianna and Dad there! They had been missing for like, a whole week! So now I knew even MORE that we would be getting Dad!

AND THEN HE CAME!!!! He was walking along the sidewalk and I practically lunged out of Brianna's grasp to get to him!!! I WAS SO EXCITED AND I STILL AM OH MY GOSH HE CAME HOME!!!!!!! HE STILL LOVES ME!!!!!!!!!!! AND I STILL LOVE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is my ecstatic self with him.

THE DOG PARK?! TWO DAYS IN A ROW?!?!

YES!!! THE DOG PARK TWO DAYS IN A ROW!!!!! IT IS NOT A MYTH, IT IS REALITY!!!!!!!

EMERLEH came over today! She and Brianna took me for a walk, which was fun, except for the dogs along the road... More on them later. And then after that we WENT IN THE CAR!!!!!! Emerleh and Brianna took me to the dog park!!!! I played with a lot of dogs because there were a lot of dogs there!!!! There was a white pit bull and these two big white dogs that looked like German Shepherds and the four of us played together and it was like WHITE PACK ATTACK!!!!!!! And then there was a Boarder Collie/great Pyrenees mix named Lacey and a big black dog named Jet who I played with, and then some sort of mixed breed named Rocky who I couldn't get to stop hitting on me... And meanwhile Brianna and Emerleh were trying to catch me and I was like "HAHHAHHAH no." They even got out the treats! (That's really drastic, considering that the number one rule my people abide by is "never bring treats to the dog park".) I personally did not find them very interesting but I guess they were accosted by another dog (who they claim was "adorable", disgusting, isn't it?) and just kept giving them the Look. They FINALLY caught me. *growl*

And then when we got home, Brianna gave me a bath. Brianna. Gave ME. A bath!!!

Yes. This picture expresses my feeling exactly. I was not a happy dog at that point.

In any case, I'm freaking out. Dad still hasn't come home!!! Has he left me forever?!

Where is Dad?!?!?!

Well, I got to go to the dog park! I played with a big standard poodle whose name was Irving, I think. He was really fun, I think I've played with him before. And I played tug-of-war with two other dogs!!! I was just playing with the brown one, Otis, but then the other one came along. I'd like to think I won...

Mine!

MINE.

MINEEEEH!!!!!!

Hah hah hah it's mine....!

NEENER!!!! I HAZ ROPEZ AND CHU DON'T!!!!!!!

But all fun aside, something sketchy really is afoot. I'm not sure what, and that's just the problem. You see this morning, Mom got me up an hour earlier than usual! And then Aunt Denny showed up and Dad left with her. It's almost eleven and he still isn't back yet!!! I don't know what's going on!!! Why did he leave me?! Does he still love me?! Did I do something that made him stop loving me?! What did I do?! Was it because I had an accident the other night?! I'm really sorry, I'm REALLY REALLY SORRY!!!! Please, just come home!!! It's a Saturday, he should have been here all day and played with me!!! Something must be wrong. Where is Dad?!

I love Thursdays!!!

Are you tired of hearing me say how much I love Thursdays? Well, too bad! I REALLY LOVE THURSDAYS!!!!!! I'LL NEVER BE DONE SAYING HOW MUCH I LOVE THEM!!!!

I got filthy dirty today!!! And I didn't get a bath!!! WHEEEEEE!!!!!!! I played with all my buddies!!! I had SOOOO MUCH FUN!!!!!!!!!! I KNOW THIS ENTRY SOUNDS LIKE EVERY OTHER ONE I WRITE ON THURSDAYS, AND THAT'S BECAUSE TODAY WAS JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER THURSDAY!!!!!!!!!!! BUT THAT'S OK BECAUSE I LOVE THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!! I came home and collapsed on my pillows. And then I wouldn't get up. Dad practically dragged me out the door to find a spot outside before bed. It was wonderful.

On the other hand, I got a flea treatment the other day. =( I don't like flea treatments. They're not comfortable.

I'd like to say something. Just one thing before I get any further into this post.

People are weird. And redheads are weirdest.

Eeeeelaina came over this weekend, she was here all Sunday and Monday morning. And then Mom and Brianna and Eeeeeeelaina left and she didn't come back. :( She's just the weirdest person I think I've ever met. Like on Sunday, she and Brianna decided that they should start calling me The White Death. So that's what they've been calling me. They decided I was a super-villain. On the other hand, maybe that's not a bad idea. Maybe I should really become a super-villain......

And take yesterday. Actually, Sunday, too. Brianna and Eeeeeeelaina took me for walks both days, and both days Eeeeeelaina decided that it would be a great idea to pretend to be something called a "juveenille deelinkwent". (I'm pretty sure that's spelled wrong, sorry.) I have no idea what that is. All I know is that there's this one house that's like, four times the size of my house, with a huge garage and a pool and dirt bikes and a pond and a long, paved driveway, and Eeeeeeeelaina decided the best thing to do would be to take a nap in the driveway. So she lied down on the side of the end of the driveway and I (seeing as Brianna put the walking collar on me) decided this was the perfect time to get it off! Brianna laughed her head off and Eeeeelaina was most upset when I stuck my nose in her armpit.

Then that redhead had the audacity to try and make me heel! She didn't give me hardly any leash and told me to heel, over and over again, and kept scolding me for pulling!!! I was so angry I sat right down and refused to move. However, I love her and she loves me and I got over it quickly. She always smells really interesting... Like other dogs and cats and birds and purfume and dirt and paint and things.

This redheaded business is just weird. Here's a picture of me with the "juveenille deelinkwent".

And this is me and Brianna. Kind of unflattering, actually. Brianna's elbow is not actually that big.

Oh, and this is my gorgeous tail.

So I'm very proud of myself.

We went to the dog park the other day. And I got in the water! I got all the way in! Brianna took a picture! I got ALL THE WAY INTO THE WATER!!!!! And then I rolled in the dirt!!! And then I hopped into the bathtub for my bath! Dad didn't even have to pick me up! I'm just really proud of myself! I don't hate water so much anymore! I don't know why!

On the other hand, I'm very sad. I think my ears are ugly. They're just not right. The edges are a dark brown, like all the dirt on my head washed down on the edges. They make my face look weird. And my nose is too long. I hate it.

I'm still trying to decide about my tail. I can't see it very well. And when I manage to catch it, I still have problems because I still can't see it and it always gets away. I don't think that's normal. So I don't like it, I guess.

Um. So yeah. I've decided... Well, IDK. I got on the doggie day care facebook, looking at all their photos, trying to find me and my friends. I found some and now I suddenly feel unsure. This one is of Captain and Deuce. Captain is the brown, fluffy one. Deuce is the smaller one.

This one is of me with Deuce.

I just... I don't know. Captain doesn't like me, I'm sure. But I don't know if Deuce likes me, either!!! I'm so torn!!! Why can't I just stop worrying about it?! I just want a dog to love me!!!

This is all just very confusing. My mind can't handle it. I need sleep. And a bacon cheese-strip.

I HAD FUN TODAY!!!!

Brianna's friend Emerleh came over today!!! She threw my tennis balls for me and petted me and loved me!!!! So did Brianna!!!! Emerleh says I'm the best dog ever, except for her sister's dog, Sable. So that makes me happy.

Brianna was being weird tonight. She was being very weird. She was playing with my ears. And I don't know why. I was tolerant, but not happy. And then she made Dad photograph us. She was also taking selfies with me. And hugging me. And I like getting hugs, but I like giving them more. Anyway, here are a couple of those pictures.

I will not post any of her selfies because she looks evil in them and I look disgruntled. Which I was. One should always keep their dog good and gruntled.

I met a new friend!!!

I got this great email from this dog named Sammy who loves my blog and so I said he could help me write it sometimes!!! I'm excited, I made a new friend!!!!

He's owned by a redhead... I wonder what that says about his personality. Personally, I decide if people are weird or not by what color their hair is. It works very well, very accurate. Like the friend Brianna has over right now, Eeeelaina. She calls me Carls!!! Why?! Anyways, she's fun. She lets me lick her face. I like people that let me lick their face. Brianna won't let me lick her face. I don't know why, I love her. :(

Like just a few minutes ago, I got in trouble for chewing and jumping on them. I don't get it, I do it cause I love them!!! (And they taste better than my Nylabone.) But they don't like it!!! It's bewildering.

Oh, oh, oh, I just remembered! I look dashing in a bandanna. I mean, I hate wearing them, but I look dashing in it. Simply smashingly dashing. You will agree. Look at this picture and you will simply just be unable to argue with me about how gorgeous I am in a bandanna. I'm not sure if red is my color, though. I'm sorry about the blurry tail, I'm very enthusiastic about being adored.

WHEEEE!!!!!

Today totally made up for yesterday!!! We all went to the dog park!!!! I ran around and played with the other dogs for like, an hour. It was SOOOOOOOOO much fun!!!!!!! It was just like doggie daycare!!!! And we ran and ran and ran all over it was sooo fuunnnn!!!! There were even tennis balls!!!!

Then Dad decided I was dirty....... *growl* So they gave me a bath!!! It was awful, I was just starting to get right again!!!! I was pleasantly rumpled. Not too muddy, just enough. It was the perfect amount. And then they went and ruined it!!! But then Brianna got out this new toy that's like a  green rubber bone with a rope and it's perfect to play tug of war with and we played and played and it was really fun!!! I'll post a picture later. So I guess the day was worth it.

This is me with my doggie buddies!

Brianna is crazy, seriously.

Seriously. She's crazy. She has this little box she carries around all the time. Well, ok, so its not really a box, but that's about as close a term I can think of. Its flat and long. It plays music. And she stands there holding it and says "Carly! Look at me!" And it makes a clicking noise when I do.

But the weirdest part is lately... I'm not sure what! She did something to it! And now it will sit on the table it or she'll hold it and tap it and it will make noises! But not just any noises, it barks! And meows and squeaks and cries and whistles and barks again! Its driving me crazy!!! I don't get it!!! What is it?! Is Brianna keeping dogs in her little flat box?? Do I need to rescue them? And how does my squeaky toy fit in there? What is going on?!

Actually, I'm really depressed. My squeaky toy is no more. Mom threw it out today because I poked a hole in it and was chomping it. I'm so sad, I LOVE my squeaky toy. Maybe they'll buy me another one. :(

Other than that, today was really fun! Mom and Dad took me to the park and I chased seagulls. The only problem was that... Well, they were forty feet above my head. That made them hard to catch. I also played fetch in the backyard with Brianna and tried to get at the birds at the bird feeder through the kitchen window. I just hate it that I can never catch them!!!

I hate to say it, but lately we've been having communication problems. I just don't understand! They yell at me and clap their hands and bop my nose when I jump up on the windowsill! I don't get it, what did I do wrong?! I'm trying to watch the birds is all, well, actually, catch them. The big ones upset me, I don't like to see them swooping around outside where I can't get to them. It just drives me crazy. So I jump up to get a better view. But then I get in trouble.

I don't know why! I'm not doing anything wrong, am I? I wish they understood me. But I can't talk!

Anyway, I suppose it's a small price to pay for having people who love me and give me bacon-cheese flavored strips for rolling around in circles. I don't get that, either, but I'll expand on it later...

This is me. And my squeaky toy. Before Mom killed it. Brianna is dangling it above my head so she can get a good picture, which I don't understand. Anyway, you should appreciate me posting a picture because it's very hard to use the touch screen on Brianna's little box to email the picture to myself. I just can't figure it out, what is it?! I know it takes pictures when it clicks, but why do music and other dogs come out of it?? I'm so confused. (By the way, that's one of my favorite tennis balls on top of my rug. Brianna calls it Howard. The other one that's not in the picture is Oscar.)